Tag: kid

Story Time

Family Storytime: Naked Cheeseburger Boy and Root Beer Snot

KC J. Hutchins

Back in the years of elementary school, my family used to go to fast food more often. You know, back when it was cheaper. To age myself, when there were actually items costing only a dollar. While hanging with my cousin, best friend, maybe my brother, and other childhood friends, my dad offered to take us there. We drive up to the menu and my dad turns back to ask what we want. Completely serious, my best friend asked for a cheeseburger without cheese. We started cracking up.
I say between laughs, “You mean a hamburger?”
My friend looked at me, then my dad, and simply said, “Yes.”
He realized what he’d said and was just trying to smooth it over.

Fast forward to sitting down and eating our stuff. My best friend starts making fun of some of our friend’s meals. I suspect to make his little incident less silly.
My dad shot back, Sure, Naked Cheeseburger Boy.”
We all lost ourselves in laughter… my cousin so much so his root beer came shooting out of his nose.
My dad turned on him and declared, “And Root Beer Snot is here to join you.”
We were all on the ground from the laughter. He gave names to the others, but I don’t remember them. (No, I didn’t get one. I was boring as a kid and only ordered chicken nuggets and French fries.) However, the legend of Naked Cheeseburger Boy and Root Beer Snot live on… the story surfacing every so often to give us a laugh.

About the Author, Story Time

Family Storytime: A Clown’s History

KC J. Hutchins

Fun fact. Did you know as a kid I debated on joining the circus and becoming a clown? No joke. I even learned how to do card tricks and make balloon animals. Why was did I want this? I was intrigued from my own family history. Turns out I came from a line of circus clowns from my grandfather’s side. They specialized in unicycle acts which amused the crowd with their antics. I learned this history when I was asked if I wanted to join a visiting circus. The ringmaster knew my grandfather and knew of my interest. I, being young, declined the offer at the time since I wanted to finish school with my friends. (What a silly decision in hindsight… so much opportunity for my future. Then again…) When I returned to my seat, I asked my grandfather why we weren’t part of it anymore. He pointed at the high wire and shook his head. In his strange way, he told me he was afraid of heights… this was shared by his children. I shook my head at the twist of fate. After all I was already known as a clown… might as well made it official.